Have you ever laughed so hard that you had to clutch your gut and gasp for breath?
For three days straight?
Thank you, Erma Bombeck.
That was me and about 350 others last weekend at Destination Hilarity, formally known as the Erma Bombeck Writers’ Workshop, a veritable laugh-in and love-in for humor writers (mostly women). With so many giggles, guffaws, belly laughs and woo hoos, my stomach muscles are still crying for mercy.
Spend three days surrounded by awesome comedic talent and a bundle of good cheer and this is what happens. While your stomach is in stitches, you fall in love.
My Bra-mance was Kindled.
My bra-mance with Erma and all the Bombeckians took flight, like lovebirds soaring, and I am still swooning.
Now, I didn’t expect the tone of this conference to be serious. Of course not. But I couldn’t have imagined being thrown into paroxysms of glee for three days straight. I think I was even chuckling in my sleep (my room mate Lois Alter Mark can attest to that).
The quality of the workshops was amazing. We learned about writing and editing and publishing, about finding your voice and writing concisely and perfecting your words until they gleam like polished silver.
Erma was all about finding the humor in everyday life. She found a treasure trove of material in her very own household. This was the lesson echoed by every presenter: the source of your material is right there. You just have to condense it into a nugget, and make it sing.
Laughter and Tears
There is nothing in life that can’t be massaged into a piece of humor, keynoter Lisa Scottoline told us, and regaled us with so many funny stories about her family.
She also shared with us that her mother had gone into hospice, suddenly, and Lisa was cutting her time at the conference short so she could go home to be with her.
And that was the other piece of this conference: pathos.
Amid the laughter there were tears. For Lisa’s mother. For Erma Bomeck’s untimely demise, which Phil Donahue described so eloquently. For Mary Lou Quinlan’s moving tribute to her mother, her greatest cheerleader.
I am still processing everything I learned, all the emotions I felt. And I can’t wait to apply all of it to my writing.
Takeaways from the Erma Conference
10. It is good to have cake at every meal and snacks twice a day. And the Marriott and University of Dayton get (gluten-free) brownie points for trying really hard to please those of us with food restrictions.
9. Erma keynoters rock. Each one was funny, warm, polished, and down-to-earth. And good looking, of course.
8. As a newbie, I wasn’t sure how I’d fit in. Can I tell you that this was the nicest, friendliest group of conference-goers I’ve ever been with?
7. Generosity of spirit and wisdom. That pretty much sums up every presenter.
6. Watching others pitch their books filled me with admiration for their talent – and the chutzpah it took to get up there in front of the crowd. I will try to do this at the next Erma conference.
5. The message that Erma said turned her life around: You Can Write! Erma went through the same self-doubts of most writers, but she took these words to heart.
4. Phil Donahue set the tone for the conference with his warm and funny tribute to Erma. Phil looks the same, talks the same and was total perfection.
3. Just as I thought that nothing could surpass Phil’s extraordinary keynote, along came Lisa Scottoline and Francesca Serratella, blowing me away with their wit, writing smarts and sheer likeability.
2. The presence of Erma, as each keynoter and presenter kept her spirit alive in their comments. There were references to her throughout: her comic genius, how she blazed a trail, and as Phil said, “She wasn’t the first. She was the only.”
1. Meeting new friends I have gotten to know online – and reconnecting with those I’ve met before – priceless.
Erma once said, “If you can’t make it better, you can laugh at it.”
Erma, you were with us every minute. You would have been proud. Thank you for showing us the way.
Helene, I love everything about this — bra-mance is brilliant! — and I loved sharing that amazing experience with you. Let’s get it on the calendar again for 2016. Roomies again, and laughing till our stomachs ache. xo
Lois Alter Mark recently posted…Comment on midweek at the oasis: four must-see videos by Debbie Denny
Roomies for evah. xoxo
Your last paragraph brought a tear to my eye for Erma’s presence was palpable at every turn. Thanks for sharing your story. We all had such different versions, but the end product was identical.
Stacey @ Nurse Mommy Laughs recently posted…Crouching Mama Hides From Tiger
Stacey, thank you! Can you believe we met on the shuttle and never ran into each other again? Looking forward to next time and we’ll have to grab more time together.
Sounds like she would’ve fit right in!
Carol Cassara recently posted…Wisdom from Downton Abbey
She continues to be an inspiration! Thanks, Carol.
You really summed it up. I was a NEWBIE too. Thanks for the memories.
Thank you, Stacey. I hope our paths cross again soon.
Hi Helene! Wow! I am not a humor writer but I think any one of us would have enjoyed spending three days laughing! It sounds like what you experienced was far beyond what a person could normally expect at a writing conference and just about makes me want to go to it next year! ~Kathy
Kathy @ SMART Living 365.com recently posted…Do You Like To Play The Game or Just In It For The Trophy?
Kathy, you must go next time, which will be 2016. You are absolutely right — any writer can benefit from it.
And not all the laughing was during the seminars either! I loved getting to know you, Lois, Linda, Marci, Anne, Julie – I am sure there are more! I can’t wait to see that little twinkle in your eye again! Fun post!
Dr. Margaret Rutherford recently posted…3 Ways to Fight Your Own Critical Voice About Your Body
Thank you, Margaret! It was SO good spending time with you.
Helene,
It sounds like the conference was amazing and it is so nice to you you and Lois’ smiling faces. I would have gone this year, but…Australia:) I’m down for 2016!
Estelle Erasmus recently posted…Giveaway for The Happy’s Pet: The Hot New Toy
You must go in 2016, Estelle! xoxo
Loved the re-cap! You nailed it to a shining E 🙂 I agree, best conference, people, sessions ever. I was sad to see it end, but looking forward to 2016. Seeing you again was one of my highlights. xoxo
Carpool Goddess recently posted…April Fool’s Day: Is there such a thing as going too far? I think not. (Just kidding!)
I can’t wait for the next one, Linda. Wish we didn’t have to wait so long. xoxo
It was wonderful and magical in a way you hope things will be, but they seldom are.
Thanks for everything, fellow Ermazons!
Anne Parris recently posted…7 Tips for Looking Your Best in a Little Black Dress
Agree 100%, Anne!
I’ve been reading accounts of this conference and need to find out when and where it will be in 2016. (That will be a very funny year, for sure). I wish it were annual. 2 years is a long time to wait. Nah. Not in writer time.
Suzanne Fluhr recently posted…Hawaii Quilt Guild Show: E Ho’onanea I Ka Mili Kapa
Look for it, Suzanne, in April 2016. Always held at the University of Dayton. Yes, it seems very far away.
That sounds like such a good time! OMG. And Phil Donahue? How cool is that.
Robin (Masshole Mommy) recently posted…That Time I Went to Bedrock. Literally. #TBT
He was so amazing. I was thrilled to see him in person.
So glad you had so many laughs. And thank you for the inspiration.
I went to school with Lisa Scottoline. Quite inspiring to see a lawyer turn power novelist.
I was friends with Lisa’s brother Frank. We shared a classic middle school experience: He got in trouble in 8th grade English for playing with my ponytail.
I was an Erma fan. Now you’ve rekindled my kindle…time to read her again.
Cyd Weissman recently posted…7 Practical Passover Lessons
Cyd, I thought of you when I was there. You must come with me in 2016. Can’t wait to talk to you about the Scottolines.
I am so glad this was such an incredible experience. You gave me chills and laughter with it, Helene.
My only question is….can we get a triple room next time? 🙂
Cathy Chester recently posted…Wordless Wednesday: Spring Weather?
Absolutely! Consider it done. xo
What a fun time I missed! It sounds like a fabulous conference…when do I sign up for next year??
Sheryl recently posted…Be Kind, Give and Be Happy (and healthy!)
Keep an eye out for registration, Sheryl, although it won’t be for another year and a half. 🙁
Sounds like you ladies had such a wonderful time, as avid reader I’ve closely bounded with the girls in my book club, but we haven’t had an event as great as yours
I highly recommend this conference, both for writers and readers, Maria.
That sounds like such a fun and encouraging conference! I love a good belly laugh… and a belly full of cake! 😉
Christine Luken recently posted…Comfort & Luxury Giveaway
Agree with you on both counts, Christine!
sounds like you had a fantastic time. It has been a long time since I have been to a conference. I love it when they are especially uplifting and inspirational!
Amber (Metro Detroit Mommy) recently posted…Planning for you Children’s Future with Rob Laney
This one was definitely a standout, Amber. Thanks for posting.
I love Erma. What a great event for you. Sounds exciting.
Debbie Denny recently posted…Disneynatureâs BEARS in theatres Friday, April 18th! #DisneynatureBears
Thanks!
This sounds like an amazing conference!! I’m glad you had such a wonderful experience.
I need one of those You Can Write mugs for my morning coffee.
Tracie recently posted…Ring Around The Sun
It will stay here on my desk and prod me to keep writing, Tracie. 🙂
Finding humor in everyday life can be difficult if it doesn’t come naturally. Sounds like you had such a great time and she sounds like a lovely person. I would have loved to go just to learn some of the things you did. I think you’re a fantastic writer. I always enjoy your posts.
Awww thank you, Lexie! You made my day. 🙂
How fun! Sounds like you had an amazing time. I have to tell you, this is the first time hearing of bra-mance and I am cracking up over here. Too funny!
Dawn Lopez recently posted…Kraft-ing an Easy Pineapple Lush Cake Recipe for Spring
Thanks, Dawn! 🙂
Sounds like a great workshop! I love all the lessons you brought home with you.
Pam recently posted…Red Velvet Cream Filled Dirt Cake Cupcakes Recipe #netflixkids
Thanks, Pam! I came away very inspired.
Looks Like You Had A Fabulous Time Thanks For Sharing!1
Lisa Jones recently posted…1,000 Kellogg’s Family Rewards Points!
Thank you, Lisa!
Wow, I am glad Erma was fun! It is awesome that you were able to get gluten free sweet treats!
Amy Desrosierss recently posted…The One and Only Zero Gravity Chair from BrylaneHome *An Outdoor Must Have!
Yes, it was! Thanks, Amy.
Wow, what an amazing and encouraging conference. Sounds like the perfect one to attend. Thank you for sharing.
Thanks for stopping by, Shauna.
So cool that you got to meet Phil Donahue!
Jessica Lieb (@bkeepsushonest) recently posted…5 Sun Safety Tips for Kids
Definitely a highlight!
I’ve never heard of this conference! Sounds like you had a great time!
Trisha recently posted…Imaginative Play with Just Pretend Kids Costumes! @JustPretendKids
It was the best.
sounds like you had a great time, what a nice experience!
Mama to 5 BLessings recently posted…Jelly Bean Bracelet — Fun to Wear & Eat!
I hope all writers can experience something like it.
I agree with a cake at every meal… love that rule. This looked like a grand time.
And they were all so good!
Sounds like you had an amazing time. I love when I laugh so hard it hurts in a good way that is.
Mommy2Jam recently posted…The hunt is on
Absolutely!
Haha! It seems to be a popular item, Danielle.
Now this would really have been a treat! I can’t even imagine how cool that day was. I’m sure you’ll remember it always!
Liz Mays recently posted…Chocolate Kissed Strawberry Dessert Cups
I will! Maybe you can come in 2016, Liz?
I wish I could have been there with you!
Connie McLeod recently posted…Sunrise, Sunset
Me tooooo!!!!
How cool! I love Erma Bombeck! She is such a funny person. 🙂
Dawn recently posted…The Good Vibrations At The Carolina Opry #sponsored @TheCarolinaOpry #MyMyrtleBeach
One of a kind. Thanks, Dawn!
What a great post! I’m so glad you had such an amazing time at the conference! I loved all of your take-aways!
Thank you, Amanda!
Bra-mance indeed; you captured exactly what it was like through the eyes of us Erma Virgins. I loved all the Erma quotes, but here is the one that stuck with me (not by Erma): “Write drunk; edit sober.”
Can’t believe we never caught up with each other; must rectify in 2016!!
Kimba recently posted…The Erma Zone
Yes, 2016 — or sooner!
Great post, Helene. Sounds like it was a blast. What a wonderful laugh fest. I am definitely adding the Bombeck Conference to my bucket list. She was truly a remarkable woman and one of my favorites.
Pat recently posted…Happy Easter, Happy Spring
Pat, I hope the stars align so that you will be able to come in 2016.
Oh wow, this would have been such an incredible experience! Glad you had such a fabulous time 🙂
Danielle recently posted…3 Ways to Practice Loving Kindness
Thank you, Danielle!
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Helene, I loved reading this and it was fabulous seeing your name on the Erma newsletter. Congrats! What a great time we all had and I must admit one of my favorite (surreal) moments was when I met you in the van from the airport to the hotel. I knew I recognized your face! Great post and looking forward to 2016!
Stacey @ Nurse Mommy Laughs recently posted…Crappy Mother’s Day!
That is so sweet of you, Stacey! It was wonderful meeting you if only for those few minutes in the van! Next time we’ll carve out more time together.